Shaving Fail: A Harsh Lesson in Grain

Whenever I see old pictures or movies about pre-Wright brothers flying machines, usually some bizarre creation that seems to have no chance of working, I wonder to myself, “what were they thinking?”  Of course the answer is simple, they were thinking it would work.  Having grown up knowing what airplanes, helicopters, and rockets look like I have information that they didn’t.  What they had was what they thought was a good idea, right up to the time that they decided to try it out.

The other week I had a good idea.

Why, I asked myself, when shaving across the grain, do I always start at the ear and go toward the chin?  What if I started at the chin, and shaved toward the neck?  Perhaps all this time I’ve been missing out on an ideal shave technique, getting closer shave with less irritation!

I owed it to myself to try, so one morning I lathered up and when it came time to shave across the grain I put metal to skin and gave it a try.

The results were instantly terrible.  I could feel the blade gripping and pulling, a rough uneven resistance coming from my skin.  With trepidation I finished the side, and with blood already beginning to form the experiment was called off nearly as soon as it had begun.

The results were conclusive.  On your left is shaving from chin to ear, on your right is shaving from ear to chin.

Oh mama, look what King Gillette has done to your boy...

Oh mama, look what King Gillette has done to your boy…

So, I will no longer be shaving in the direction of my chin to my ear.  I don’t have to learn that lesson twice!


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